I know women who seems to be so self-confident. Life does not seem to phase them at all. They radiate an inner sense of well-being. They just seem to be happy being themselves.
I have spent most of my life trying to reach that place. I was insecure as a child. My teen years were a challenge to see where I fit in. I used the standards of the world to define myself and look for a sense of worth. I was happiest as a young married woman with a family of my own. I loved my family more than anything in the world.
I didn't realize how much of what I thought of myself was tied to what my husband thought of me until he left. I was an emotional wreck who blamed myself for his leaving. Obviously I wasn't good enough. I wore an imaginary sign that said "worthless".
Thank goodness I came to know better. I really am okay. I like being who I am and I enjoy being with myself. The journey from worthless to infinite worth was a spiritual journey that took several years. I had to finally internalize all the teachings of the church and let them sink into my heart. And as I opened myself in prayer to the Father, I was blessed to feel His Love. I think that even if we were loved and adored by the whole world we would not understand what it really means to be loved until we know that He loves us. I am eternally grateful that He reached out and touched me with that understanding. I am a daughter of my Heavenly Father, who loves me, and I love Him.
As I journal I have discovered the joy of writing my feelings in poetry. I thought that perhaps someone else might relate to my musings. LDS poems are just a part of these. Many are just simple poems about my life but since I am LDS they all reflect my beliefs.
I love being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I joined back in 1964 after a long struggle with faith. I had loved the Savior ever since I could remember, but the church of my youth deserted me as it moved into the intellect movement of the 60's. Without spiritual guidance, I fell away. The Lord distinguished between the words of my mouth and the longing of my heart. He knew that I wanted to believe and so he sent a young woman who told me the story of the Restored Gospel. She bore her testimony of Jesus Christ and promised me that I could know for myself and have my own testimony.
Now forty-six years later I can only thank her from the bottom of my heart for introducing me to the church. Indeed I do have my own testimony. I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet, called to restore Christ's church to the earth. We have a prophet today who leads and guides us. I am so grateful for Latter-day scriptures that bear testimony of Jesus Christ. The Book of Mormon is the Word of God. It stands as another witness of the Savior and it's truths have touched my life in very personal ways.
I hope that my poetry reflects the growth of my testimony and my love for Jesus Christ.
Now forty-six years later I can only thank her from the bottom of my heart for introducing me to the church. Indeed I do have my own testimony. I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet, called to restore Christ's church to the earth. We have a prophet today who leads and guides us. I am so grateful for Latter-day scriptures that bear testimony of Jesus Christ. The Book of Mormon is the Word of God. It stands as another witness of the Savior and it's truths have touched my life in very personal ways.
I hope that my poetry reflects the growth of my testimony and my love for Jesus Christ.
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